I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
so much tequila, so little girl.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
