I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
