He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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