You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Houston, we have a blender
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
