guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
it glows. i had to have it.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
