some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
I did not marry a roomba.
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