So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
