How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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