Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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