We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
