Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
