There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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