are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
