Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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