I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
