I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I need moral support for this bender
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
