Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Randomize
