Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
