question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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