oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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