Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
did you just send me my own nude
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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