sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Randomize
