I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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