fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
