Banned from zoo.
Again?
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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