break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
