So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
