Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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