I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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