you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
