We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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