Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
