census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
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