Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
