Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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