apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
