D3 body, D1 cock
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
