i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
