Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
