Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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