On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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