i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
