Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
