oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Randomize
