that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Randomize
