Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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