I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
