I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
