he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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