Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Randomize
